The new collection is hanging on the racks and the selection is huge but actually, you are stressed for time and you are just looking for that certain romper – maybe the shop assistant will know. Well, a shopping scene can start off perfectly but it can end a lot worse. After all, the shop assistant is annoyed and answers you in a snappish way to look for the romper yourself. This is not very kind. However, does a shop assistant always have to smile just because of the job? Do we have to smile because society wants us to? Many of those super happy faces are faked anyways. Is there still real friendliness happening in today’s world?
How Does Friendliness Work?
Let’s press rewind for a second. Mom and dad used to teach us, to always say “please” and “thank you”. While we were playing with dolls or cars, they preached: “Don’t say ‘I want’ but ‘may I have please'". Later on, those good manners would help us to make friends and to be integrated in society. After all, friendliness is still very high up in the general agenda. A few years later however, it’s not that important anymore. It’s just about getting that romper as fast as possible.
Why Friendliness Has Two Sides
Nevertheless, there’s still a requirement of friendliness going on in people’s minds. Therefore, we also get annoyed of conductors who don’t control our tickets with a big smile on their faces. However, is there a reason that a conductor has to throw a tea party in every train compartment so people can enjoy the best rides of their life? The wages are fixed. The working hours are scheduled. Sounds like there is no time to be hyper friendly.
For the sake of completeness, let’s have a look at the reverse side. Especially in the US, at least 20 percent of the waiters’ wages depend on their friendliness. That’s quite a lot compared to other countries. However, workers in Europe also increase their chances to get upgraded if they are friendly. Obviously, friendliness is a great means to an end – most of the time.
Friendliness In The Longer Term
Last but not least, social media has showed a huge impact on the understanding of friendliness lately: likes, comments, follow and un-follow. Photos of cappuccinos and latte art. #Viewgoals and #ThrowbackThursday. Let’s face it, there’s a massive overflow of repeating pictures. Apparently, our society is craving for more authenticity. And no, an artificial smile is not authentic at all. This would mean the shop assistant does it all right. There’s no reason to smile and fake friendliness if you are not in the mood for it – right?
Not quite. There is still a difference between insolence and honesty. This is also what mom and dad used to teach us. Possibly, the shop assistant and the customer can talk in a respectful way about the romper issue. The same is true for social media and for the general contact with others. Just keep in mind: honesty is the best policy – and so is friendliness.
Get the Look:
Text by Carmen
Photographed by Romana from fouraway.ch.
